Introspection from the 31st Century
by Aleine Skyfire
Summary: Introspection by Buzz, Warp, Mira, etc. - Warp's past and Buzz's errant thoughts among other things. Chapter 3: Mira's uphill climb.
1. Retrospect at 3 o'clock

**1. Retrospect at 3 o'clock**

Y'know, it's kinda hard to sleep on a metal cot that's too small for you. That's what my bed has been for the past month, so you can guess how long I've been dealing with insomnia.

Argh, this is stupid! _I'm_ stupid! I am _such_ an _idiot!_

Here I am, stuck in a tiny Star Command prison cell, all because I wanted to have a little fun and adventure.

C'mon, people – is that too much to ask??

When I was a kid, life was good. My parents were your average storybook parents, and – believe it or not – I was a normal boy. Y'know, beating the latest videogame, stuffing the girls' lockers with trash… all that jazz. To top it all off, I was a straight-A student. Yeah, history and poetry and stuff like that bored me to death, but I've always been good with machines, so algebra, chemistry, and physics were a piece-a cake.

Like I said, life was good.

Then there was that day that I got called out of the gym on an emergency. I reported to the principal's office, and that's when I found out.

Mom and Dad were dead.

It was a stupid speeder crash, and it was a stupid drunk driver who killed them.

I was just fifteen, a sophomore in high school.

Not every life that goes bad starts with childhood tragedies like the shrinks say. It just so happens that that's what happened to _me_.

Uncle Dev took me in after that. I continued getting good grades – I guess to honor Mom and Dad's memory. But at the same time, I got involved for a while with some of the rougher guys in class. Don't ask me how my first cigarette went – I ain't telling. I almost got into drugs, too, until my uncle found out.

**Bang**. Grounded until graduation.

Okay, so in retrospect, I guess I did blow it. But the man didn't have to lock me up in the house! And all the rules I had to follow when I was at school were ridiculous! A week after my graduation, I turned eighteen. When that day came, I moved out, permanently.

So there I was, a valedictorian (Did I forget to mention that? Sorry.) graduate on my own, with no money and no prospects. Fortunately, an old buddy of mine took me in. A few days after I moved in, I got a job as a tech programming computers in spaceships for Gemini Enterprises. The pay wasn't much, but it wasn't a bad job.

But I wanted more.

I wanted to get out and see the galaxy. Sure, I'd been in outer space before but never for very long. I wanted to cruise, baby.

I also wanted to get away from people constantly telling me what to do. Oh yeah, freedom from rules sounded sweet.

But I ain't dumb – I never have been. You don't get fed by people _not_ telling you what to do. I knew that. So I suffered through all the dumb regulations at Gemini.

Couple months later, I was working after hours on the mainframes on one of Gemini's dreadnaughts when somebody came aboard the ship. Two somebodies. One I recognized as one of our accountants, and the other one sounded sorta like a British-accented computer. It didn't take a genius to figure out that they were having a private conversation, so I hid.

Come to find out, the accountant was smuggling schematics out of Gemini for this other guy, who he kept calling "my evil Emperor".

I don't have to tell ya that it was weird.

The "Emperor" said something about wanting a new tech – preferably humanoid – who actually _knew_ what he was doing, unlike the other "lackeys" he had. _That's_ when I started paying attention. The accountant said that he might be able to find someone at Gemini, if the price was right. The "Emperor" suggested _five times_ the annual tech salary at Gemini.

Oh yeah, baby!

Like the eager kid I was, I sprang out of hiding and said, "I'll work for you, mister!"

The guy looked me over as I, in turn, stared at him in shock. I'd seen a photo of Emperor Zurg once on the news before, but that could not have prepared me for meeting him in person.

Weird guy. Bucket-shaped purple helmet with red eyes, green mouth grill, and small silver horns. Purple-and-red robes with silver chest plate and gauntlets (and I could tell right away that this guy was a cyborg: those weren't gloves he was wearing – those were his _hands_). Black-and-red cape, a "Z" in the center of his chest like a light or a button.

Okay, so he didn't pay attention to trend, but hey! he was an emperor! Who cares about trends, anyway?

But I knew I'd made a mistake jumping out like that. The Evil Emperor Zurg had earned notoriety for his hostility toward the Galactic Alliance – technically, we were on opposite sides of a cold war. Still, he was interested in me.

"Who are you?" he demanded.

"Warp Darkmatter, sir," I said with more cockiness than I felt.

He grilled me on my knowledge of computers. I answered every one of his questions correctly and handed him my PDA, which had my school _and_ job records. Between my knowledge of computers and my records, he was impressed. "Well, Darkmatter, are you interested in working for me?"

"Uh, Your Highness, I…"

"What is it? Speak up, boy!"

"I – I'd be betraying the Galactic Alliance, sir. I'd be betraying my home."

He laughed – and the way I know him _now_, I know he was laughing at me. "Does that bother you, Darkmatter?"

"Kinda."

"Oh please! Betrayal, home – hah! Betrayal's a part of life, Darkmatter, and the sooner you learn that, the better off you'll be. And what home do you have, anyway? Your parents are dead - you said so yourself!"

_That_ hit home, and he apparently saw that.

He gave an electronic sigh. "I can see there are some things I'm going to have to teach you. Are you willing to learn?"

Should I have said it? I'm not so sure anymore. "Yes."

That did it. I was in.

Zurg took me to his home, Planet Z. Everybody's heard of Planet Z – it's horror-tale material. And it became my new home.

It wasn't bad. It was actually pretty fun. With all the state-of-the-art technology I was working with and even – in some cases – being _given_, I was in _heaven!_ If this was evil, chain me to the wall!

Ha-ha, bad joke.

Besides a capable tech, Zurg had also been trying to find somebody who could infiltrate Star Command. As the rising top law-enforcement agency, it posed a big threat to Zurg's schemes. Zurg wanted to send someone into _The_ Academy to work his way up from Cadet to Space Ranger.

At eighteen, I was the perfect choice.

I registered just in time to make it before the first semester began.

Funny, if I'd ever thought that Uncle Dev's rules were bad, these people were ten times worse! This was the military, and they made that _painfully_ clear.

Still, I did really well. So did my roommate. Actually, he did _better_ than me, which was something I was _totally_ unused to. For a while, there was a lot of competition – pretty fierce on my side, pretty good-natured on his. My belligerence (yeah, I can use big words) didn't make for a very comfortable first three months.

Universal rule: all boys love to play pranks in some form or other. For some guys, it's just verbally trapping their sisters in their hard-to-follow logic. For other guys, it's the real stuff, like buzzers and itching powder and stuff.

I kinda told ya earlier what kind of pranks _I_ like.

So a couple of my classmates and I were planning revenge on our computer science teacher for his stupid extra homework that didn't teach us anything. Yeah, he was a real pain in the neck. It wasn't just me – that's what _everybody_ thought.

Including my roommate and rival. He overheard us planning, and I thought for sure that we were _dead_. He was _such_ a by-the-book guy, I thought he'd turn us in, or at least give us one of his already-infamous lectures.

So I got one of the shocks of my life when he grinned and said, "That's not the way you do it. Here's what you do…" And he launched into a full plot that was well thought-out.

I was gaping. I couldn't believe my ears.

Well, we pulled the prank off without a hitch, and nobody was ever the wiser. That's when I decided that my roommate and I would work pretty well together.

Okay, listen to this, 'cause it's important:

Buzz Lightyear and Warp Darkmatter.

Yeah, we _were_ a great team. The best.

We pulled off our pranks together and helped each other with our homework.

We teased each other about the girls we dated, and Buzz could get _really_ merciless about ribbing me on that one. Okay, so maybe it was kinda nuts to go out with a new gal every month and sometimes a couple of them at a time, but hey! can I help it if the ladies love me? We also argued about which was better: redheads or brunettes. _I_ preferred redheads (think it's kinda cute when they blow their tops); _he_ preferred brunettes. (That redheaded rookie in his new team is pretty cute – wonder if he'll come to his senses and start going out with her.)

So went the two years at Milky Way Academy.

When graduation came at last, Buzz came out with the highest score ever, and I was right behind him. Star Command welcomed us with open arms, and Commander Nebula, knowing how good of a team Buzz and I had been in the Academy, decided to keep us together.

'Course, I was reporting this to Zurg, and he wasn't too happy about the "new boy" on the scene. Lightyear was a potentially dangerous foe that he wanted out of the way.

Zurg had never been more right.

I tried to stop Buzz from damaging Zurg's schemes too much without giving myself away – I really did! But Buzz was just too _crater-blasted **good!**_

Almost twenty years passed with this back-and-forth game. Zurg grew more and more powerful, and Buzz got better and better. He had to go, and I knew it.

But eighteen years of being with a guy _does_ things to you, y'know? Buzz… Buzz was the best friend I'd ever had, even if he _was_ really nuts about the rules.

(Funny, he _loved_ rules – wrote _half_ of them, in fact! – and I _hated_ 'em. And we were _still_ a good team!)

But then came Zurg's kidnapping of three LGMs, and let me just say for the record that, no, I had _nothing_ to do with it. My only part in the whole affair was to keep Buzz from finding the LGMs, which, of course, I botched. It wasn't _my_ fault – it was those stupid rescuer LGMs! They proved Buzz's hunches right.

Before that mission, I'd gotten the call from Zurg to pack it up at Star Command. He wanted to pull me out of there and bring me on fulltime. We just had to fake my death so spectacularly that genius-boy Lightyear would never suspect the truth.

When Zurg told Buzz that he'd activated the self-destruct on his little base, I knew that this was it. I didn't plan on that huge beam falling on me, though; I got squeezed helplessly between junk. In the following explosion, my right arm was blown away – yeah, there's a reason why they say pyrotechnics are dangerous, trust me.

I'll admit it – I was scared. Fire's all around you, you can't move when you try… who wouldn't be scared? My guess is that even His Purpleness would be wailing.

Me, I was a soldier. Whatever my future was, I was gonna face it like a soldier.

Then Buzz found me.

This was the hard part. I figured that the moment the place blew, the floor would give way and I'd be safe underground – that's the way Zurg works. But if Buzz was still here trying to get me out when that happened, he'd be captured by Zurg.

So long forever, Buzz Lightyear.

Call me a wimp, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't let Buzz die – not after all we'd been through together. Even later on, when I was gunning for him as Agent Z, I'm not sure that I would've done it. Even when Zurg gave me a direct order, I'm not sure I'd've done it.

So much for the cynical, sardonic Darkmatter.

I told him to get outta there. He wouldn't listen to me. Desperate, I punched his jetpack on, rocketing him high into the sky.

So long, Partner.

Y'know, if I'd let him stay, he'd more than likely be dead now. I _definitely_ wouldn't be in jail right now.

If I'd know this _then_, would I have still let him go?

Weird thing is…

Yeah.

Yeah, I still woulda done it…

One of the few functions they left on my mechanical arm is my chronometer.

3 am.

I've heard of three o'clock in the morning. It's supposed to be the time for mulling over stuff, usually negative stuff.

Guess I'm upholding the time-honored tradition, huh?

I wonder if Zurg'll ever get me outta here. Probably. And then I'll probably go back to being his Agent Z (and I still think that name's stupid). His bad guy.

But – sweet mother-a Venus – I'm actually gonna _miss_ Star Command.

I'm gonna miss Buzz.

Not that I'd ever tell him that, of course – I really _would_ die first.

Aw _craters_. Zurg, get me outta here before I go crazy with all this mushy stuff!

It's 3 am, and I've been up all night.

I'm gonna try to get some sleep.

**Disclaimer:**

I obviously don't own BLoSC, because if I did, I would've made a second season and a bunch of movies to wrap up the story satisfactorily.

**Author's Notes:**

In watching _Buzz Lightyear of Star Command: The Adventure Begins_ for the first time in a while, I noticed something off-kilter – Warp sent Buzz away. Now really, why would he do that? Warp knew that he didn't need to fear for his own safety because it was all an elaborate hoax. If Warp had let Buzz stay, Buzz would have been captured by Zurg, so this begs the question: if Warp issuch a bad guy, why did he send Buzz away? Forcibly, even – remember, he _pounded_ Buzz's jetpack button.

Personally, I think that Warp actually couldn't bring himself to let Buzz die. He demonstrated this fact in "Ancient Evil" and apparently (I've never seen this episode for myself, but I've heard about it) "Tag Team," too. This whole story was built around this thesis as a way to show _why_ he did it.

In future fics, Warp's past as shown here (and created by yours truly) will remain the "Darkmatter canon."

Last but not least, this is my very first fan fiction here! I am so excited! I welcome reviews with open arms, and shun flames with every subatomic particle of my being! I have not seen the whole BLoSC series by a long shot, so if you ever notice _anything_ that conflicts with canon or seems OOC, please let me know so that I can edit and improve my work!


	2. Unprofessional

**2. Unprofessional**

Unprofessional.

That's what it is: pure unprofessionalism… uh, that's not even a real word, is it?

For the moment, I'm going to pretend I don't care.

I'm a veteran Space Ranger Captain! She's a princess rookie who's nearly _twenty years_ my junior! I shouldn't be thinking about her like this! It's purely unprofessional!

Warp would like her. He's always liked redheads.

We argued about that, you know. He liked redheads, and I liked brunettes.

All right, _that_ line of thought is unprofessional, too. Warp is currently serving time for being a traitor to Star Command.

Professionally, I'm relieved that he's behind bars.

Unprofessionally, I _hate_ it. It hurts. He was the best friend I'd ever had, and it was all a lie.

Back to my _other_ unprofessional dilemma – I might as well work it out of my system.

She's really pretty. That flaming red hair contrasts very nicely with her cyan skin and cerulean-on-yellow eyes. Her eyes are big, bigger than human eyes. I like them. They're very expressive. And flouting military tradition, she didn't cut her hair short. It's still waist length. She wouldn't have looked as good in a shoulder-length bob, anyway.

She has a great figure, too. It's not suggestive like the supermodels – not that you can tell the difference, anyway, when she's wearing her spacesuit. Even though she has muscle, she's very wiry and slender.

Her voice is kinda cute – it's like there's a tweak to it. Sounds pretty girlish – except when she's mad. I have to be careful not to call her "Princess," 'cause that'll do it. Redhead temper.

I guess that's why I never went for redheads.

But this one… wow.

She's so bright and witty – and fun to be around. I have more fun going on a mission with _her_ than I ever did dating any other girl.

And she's Tangean. She has those super-cool ghosting powers. No, they weren't so cool when she used them against me to hijack the _Alpha I_, but hey, that turned out just fine in the end. If she hadn't forced me, Booster, and XR out of Star Command, we would've been brainwashed like everyone else here was. So… Mira saved us from that by her little stunt, and in effect, saved the galaxy.

Wow.

Yes, she _is_ young. She can't be any older than twenty. When I was last in Tangea, she was still in her mid-teens, but that _was_ a few years ago. Anyway, even though she's just a rookie, she is really, _really_ good.

I mean, come on: she beat _Level 10!_ _I_ _never_ beat 10!

Any woman who can best me is worth checking out, don't you think?

Team Lightyear has only been together for a month, and I've only known Mira for just a little bit longer. Already, the Galaxy's Greatest Hero has a schoolboy crush on his pretty princess partner.

No, stop it.

Talk about something else.

Team Lightyear… yeah.

My job is both tougher and easier than ever before.

Before, when it was just me and Warp, I was sort of the leader by default, but we shared the responsibility when things went wrong. Now, I'm the sole veteran in a team of rookies (as well as being nearly _two decades_ older than anyone else – *gulp*). When things go wrong, it's solely _my_ fault. Ouch.

On the other hand, I've got three backups as opposed to one. And I have to say, these guys _really_ come in handy. Booster knows lots of practical things on account of his former job as janitor – he's also the big muscle-man. XR being a robot actually comes in _really_ handy – he can talk with other machines, and his chest cavity seems to be a veritable bottomless pit of useful gadgets. And there's more, but it'll set my brain spinning if I continue.

And then, of course, there's Mira's ghosting abilities. _Very_ handy, those.

Argh, and I've come back to Mira, haven't I?

Get a life, Lightyear – she's your partner, not your girlfriend! She'll never want to be your girlfriend!

*gasp*

Mira's voice heard in the background. Hi, Buzz!

**Buzz:** Uhh, hi, Mira.

**Mira:** I was going to grab a bite for lunch at the cafeteria. You wanna come?

**Buzz:** Umm, sure… Where's Booster and XR?

**Mira:** Booster ate early so that XR could show him something in the Science Bay, so I guess it'll be just you and me.

**Buzz:** And, um, you're not… _worried_ about that?

**Mira:** frown in her voice Worried? Why would I be worried? Ohh, because people might think we're dating!

**Buzz:** Uh, yeah.

**Mira:** grin in her voice Would it be inappropriate if we were? No, don't answer that – I don't wanna know. So are you coming?

**Buzz:** Uhh, sure… see ya there.

**Mira:** Right. See ya!

**Buzz:** Umm, wow. Okay, Lightyear: get a grip. You're being completely unprofessional. Yeah…

Buzz Lightyear Personal Log, over and out.

"_Hey, Mira – wait up!"_

**Author's Note:**

This is a what-if story – what if Buzz had had a crush on Mira early in their relationship? This'd be in the month following the movie, I guess. This is also just meant to be a humor piece… Buzz is in – gasp! – denial. Lol!


	3. Where I Am

**Author's Note:**

Okay, you have Historian1912 to thank for giving me the push to get this done. Without him, I might never have done this one, so this is dedicated to him.

Thank you to all of you that reviewed and favorited this little series! I sure never expected it be as successful as it's been!

**==3. Where I Am==**

I worked hard to get where I am today. Top of my class, recipient of the Gold Medal of Honor, copilot for Buzz Lightyear, best of the best. That's what me, and I'm not bragging, m'kay—these are just the facts.

The story _behind_ those facts… well, _that's_ a story worth telling. I remind myself of it whenever I'm feeling discouraged. I just say that, if I could get _this_ far, I can do anything. It's almost true.

It was an uphill climb, all the way.

For starters, I'm a Tangean Royal. That means I should have a Tangean racial superiority complex. I have my mom to thank for my lack of that particular psychological disease—and my dad to thank for strengthening it. Not that he lacks that trait himself—nope, are you kidding me? He's at the top of the food chain, and he acts like it.

See, he's the King. That makes _me_ a Princess.

_The_ Princess, actually—the heir to the Tangean throne. Obstacle number two: I can't even keep my job forever, because as soon as my dad dies or steps down (and I wouldn't put it past him to pull that just to drag me home), I'll be crowned the Queen of Tangea. My career with Star Command will be irretrievably finished.

My dad was my biggest problem. When I first told him that I wanted to be a Space Ranger, he put his foot down. Mira, you're a Princess, blah, blah, blah… you're a Royal and therefore superior, yada, yada, yada… you'd get yourself hurt or killed…

But I'm just as stubborn as my dad—maybe even more so. I didn't give up, and after a year and a half of enthusiastic battle, Dad finally sat me down and looked me in the eye. "You're absolutely sure you want to do this?"

I leaned forward. "I've never been more sure of anything in my entire life."

He hugged me tightly, as if he was afraid I'd just disappear.

To this day, I'm still not sure why he let me go, especially since he's been trying to pull me back ever since. But he did.

He was almost crying when I boarded that transport, and I almost cried, too. We hugged, and he whispered, "Be safe."

"I will be. I promise."

I didn't see him again for another four months. I never thought I could be homesick for a planet that I'd once felt was stifling me, but I was. I missed my dad and my home something awful.

I cried myself to sleep that first night in the Academy.

So homesickness was another battle I had to fight, and it wasn't the only one by a long shot. I was the first Tangean and the first person of royal blood ever to enter Star Command. That got the media's attention, and I was constantly on the run from the cameras whenever I left the campus.

I also had to combat the opinions of my teachers and fellow trainees. People either looked at me with prejudice (seeing me as the representation of a racist people that made life difficult for anyone they came in contact with) or with awe (either of my ghosting powers or my royalty). I didn't break through that ice until the second semester, and it wasn't till the second year that I finally developed a couple of lasting friendships.

I was a lonely girl.

I was also an ambitious one, however—I had a goal, and I was going to reach it, come chaos or high water.

Buzz Lightyear had saved my planet and inspired me to become a Ranger. He was also The Best, and I was going to match his grades or die trying.

The sad truth is that, though Star Command Academy isn't a picnic, the majority of Rangers are pretty mediocre. Well, I'd be danged if I couldn't rise above that and show them what a Space Ranger was _supposed_ to be.

That, of course, wasn't easy. Buzz had terrifically high grades, and I wore myself into the ground trying not just to match them but to _beat_ them.

My hard work paid off. At the end of two years, our averages tied at 99. I didn't always match him in some courses, but I _did_ beat him in others, setting impossibly high new records for future trainees to beat. I graduated at the head of my class with honors.

Even then, my journey wasn't over. Commander Nebula informed me that I was to be partnered with Captain Lightyear, after the death of his longtime partner Warp Darkmatter. He told me that he wanted me to give my next session on the training deck my all—Buzz would be watching.

I passed. I passed Level 9—Buzz Lightyear's level—when no one else did. And I beat Level 10, an unprecedented accomplishment. Not even the Great Galactic Defender ever came that far.

But my troubles weren't over.

Buzz was duly impressed with my performance but refused to take me on as a partner. He didn't want anyone to get hurt because of him, like Warp supposedly had. I was hurt and angry. I could take care of myself—couldn't he see that? Hadn't I just done the impossible—beat a level that not even _he_ could pass?

Well, then came the whole Unimind thing. I came out of that more than a little shaken and definitely wiser, and I had a medal to show for it.

But I was also elated. I had faced down everything life had thrown my way and emerged stronger for it. I was invincible.

Of course, I had to learn the hard way that I _wasn't_, and I discovered that my journey still wasn't over. In fact, I found out that it's an ongoing thing, a road I'll be walking for the rest of my life.

Funny thing is, that doesn't scare me. Nope. It _excites_ me.

I've been a Space Ranger for more than two years now. I'm no longer a Rookie. I've passed some very interesting bends in the road, and I see a couple more in the foreseeable future.

But I'm not scared.

I'm facing the future with my team at my side, and together, we can do _anything_.

**

* * *

Author's Note:**

Woo-hoo, I finally get around to Mira's back-story! First time I've ever written her 1st-person POV, too.

A Merry and Blessed Christmas to you all!

_**Please review!**_


End file.
